As 2024 approached, I sat down and asked myself the same serious question I’ve been asking myself for the past few months: how do you feel about your life? Are you where you want to be?
The quiet answer that came from deep inside and I had been ignoring for the past year piped up loud and clear “Help me! I’m so burnt out, life is chaotic and unsustainable!“
I realised that due to this burn out, (much of it autistic burnout) I hadn’t produced much content for this blog, or for my Youtube channel. I had somehow been operating in raw survival mode and compensating by doing the bare minimum and numbing out. While doing the bare minimum and choosing to tune out is okay for a limited amount of time, it becomes a problem when you realise that months or years have slipped by and your soul feels like it’s dying a slow death.
I couldn’t stop tuning out from the world, so I finally tuned in to my inner self.
When I asked myself that question during some time off work, it was as if I came out from a trance and saw my life for what it was at that moment in time, and I didn’t like where it was going. Where I was going.
I needed a reset. A big one. Decluttering the house wasn’t enough. It was time to act and push a different button. One I had been scared to push.
I made the big and final decision to reduce my hours at work to part time. Officially, my new hours will start from the middle of next month. Will it be a financial hit? Yes, but in my experience, time is the ultimate currency. Time can also be used to heal and create.
With the time I will gain, I’m going to return to doing what lights me up inside; writing about decluttering and minimalism, growing my Youtube channel, and continuing to improve my colouring (I love adult colouring!) Most importantly, I’ll be living much more slowly, which I feel is much-needed to recover from the burnout I’ve been experiencing.
The decision wasn’t made lightly, but with the acceptance that I simply couldn’t continue on the path I was on as well as maintain my home and be present for my children, the eldest who also has autism and ADHD.
I think we’re all guilty of speeding through life without stopping to ask ourselves the critical questions. The ones that can make the difference between living a life of regret or one of true satisfaction and fulfilment – neither of which can be found by looking outwards.
If you also feel like you’re life has been spinning out of control, or like you can’t catch up with your own life, stop. Listen to that inner voice. Really listen. Now act. Push that button and say ‘yes’ to your soul.